How to deal with crappy people

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Published : August 11th, 2016
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Category : Opinions and Analysis

James Altucher wrote a blog post several years ago that has stuck with me. The gist of the post was that the best way to deal with crappy people is to not engage with them in any way under any circumstances. Do not argue with them, do not attempt to give them advice, and do not make any effort to get them to like you. Just ignore them.

Altucher’s message has saved me a lot of aggravation over the years. Once in a while I fall into the trap of interacting with someone I should ignore, but I’m usually successful at preventing crappy people from disrupting my peace of mind — by essentially blotting them out.

I don’t have any crappy people in my personal life. At least, I don’t at the moment. However, as someone who publishes stuff on the internet I regularly attract emails from crappy people I don’t know. In the distant past these emails would sometimes annoy or disturb me and occasionally I would get sucked into a ‘tit for tat’ exchange, but no longer. I’ve learnt that there is no point trying to mud-wrestle a pig, because you both end up dirty and the pig enjoys it.

Just to be clear, I have no problem with polite criticism. In fact, when I write something that is logically or factually incorrect I am grateful if someone takes the trouble to explain where I went wrong. Crappy people, however, do not disagree in a polite and well-reasoned manner; instead, they launch insults.

Nowadays when I receive an email from a crappy person, I never respond. As soon as I realise the nature of the email, I delete it and add the sender’s address to my “blocked senders” list, thus ensuring that I will never hear from them again.

The best emails sent to me by crappy people are the ones that have an insult in the subject line, because I don’t have to waste time opening these. For example, last week someone sent me an email with “You are a moron” as the subject line. I don’t know what the email contained, because I never opened it. I just added the sender’s address to my “blocked” list and then deleted it. My guess, however, is that it was a reaction to a post I had published a day earlier (http://tsi-blog.com/2016/08/does-the-fed-support-the-stock-market/). The post in question debunked the claim that the Fed routinely props up the stock market by purchasing stocks, ETFs and/or futures, and I’ve discovered over the years that the surest way to provoke a vitriolic response is to write something that casts aspersions on a popular market-manipulation story or that expresses anything other than unequivocal optimism about gold and silver.

It has become easy for me to ignore emails from crappy people I don’t know, but it’s a lot more difficult, and not always possible, to ignore such people in our personal or business lives. However, if there are certain crappy people you can’t completely blot out, for example, if your boss is one or your sister is married to one, then you should at least minimise your interaction with them. Life is too short to do otherwise.

 

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A hospital emergency ward has a doctor or intern responsible for triage to “determine the priority of patients' treatments based on the severity of their condition. This rations patient treatment efficiently when resources are insufficient for all to be treated immediately.” (Wiki)

Of course, this makes sense, but someone had to invent this process. During the 1800’s, increasing larger battles involving tens or hundreds of thousands of troops created more casualties than a handful of army surgeons could effectively treat. They found through trial and error that they could save the largest number by dividing the wounded into three groups, hence the ‘tri’ in triage.

1) Those who would die if the received help or not
2) Those who would live if they received help or not
3) Those who would live only if they received help

The doctors treated the last group first and the remainder only after they were finished with that group. Regardless of the selection error rate, triage saved the greatest number of patients.

I practice triage socially and divide people into three groups.

1) People who are beyond help
2) People who are ok
3) People who can be helped

I concentrate on the 3rd group. Why waste time on people who cannot be helped or don’t need it? It sounds cold and cruel, but with limited time and effort, it helps the greatest number of people.
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A hospital emergency ward has a doctor or intern responsible for triage to “determine the priority of patients' treatments based on the severity of their condition. This rations patient treatment efficiently when resources are insufficient for all to be  Read more
Gerold B. - 8/11/2016 at 1:05 PM GMT
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